Twisted 2016

Twisted Learn to dance to the music of the Universe.


As 2016 draws to a close I was very tempted to say my “Thank F…ing goodness it’s over, what a crazy year it’s been filled with so many sad events” BUT my mind drifted to the joy, the courage, the incredible experiences, the amazing lessons, the unconditional love and kindness I was gifted, the time and generosity of those close to me and those I am connected to in spirit but yet to meet in the flesh. Both strangers and friends have enriched my life this year.

So many beautiful babies were born this year, lovers secured their commitments to one another, people went out exploring, on magical adventures, changed directions in their lives, achieved their dreams, shared special moments, comforted each other in moments of sadness. All plans became little floating bubbles, no rigidity at all. There was illness and healing, and well, so much more, we are living an extraordinary life with all its ups and downs and twists and turns.

Unravel – Finding a way back to your essence is a journey worth traveling.

 

How fortunate we were that we got our Australian citizenship at the beginning of this year, a dream I have had since I was 6 years old. 

How fortunate I followed my intuition beyond the fear of judgement and posted on Facebook asking for help, I listened and then took action. Dylan’s life was saved through the efforts of many, what incredible things we have learnt, not just the medical mambo jumbo but the human stories, the compassion, the commitment, the generosity …. I could go on and on. 

Gifted the opportunity to shed my armor and be vulnerable, and witness the magnificence of the human spirit, the courage of children, the love between brothers, the presence and acceptance of little people on massive journeys.
How fortunate I feel that no matter the physical distance I am still connected with those I love, technology has most certainly helped enrich my relationships, bridging time and distance, especially at those times of crisis but also times of shared joy.

Both tears and laughter have been my constant companions this year, how grateful I am that I can feel such depths of emotion.

Be Here Now – See your Wisdom


This year has been profound, both terrifying and magnificent. I know, I love, I laugh, I am more because of these experiences.

Thank you for the music, and the incredible ride. 

Ps the roller coaster was thrilling I am now ready to have a go on the ……. surprise me, I trust you!

My Perception colors my Reality


This year was a little bit Twisted, as my world began to Unravel I had to learn to dance to the music of the universe, finding a way back to my essence has been a journey worth traveling. I am here now, I see my wisdom, as my perception colours my reality, I will always reserve the right to change, grow, expand and evolve.

I reserve the right to Change, Grow, Expand, Evolve


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Hate … 


Hate is such a strong word … One I don’t like to use … But seriously … I absolutely hate that my normal is supporting my son while he vomits, I hate that he is so critically thin, that the treatments I sign him up for damage parts of his delicate body, I hate that I am so helpless and I hate that I am angry.
I am so exhausted.
I hate feeling this aching in my chest.
Fuck cancer !
I love being honest.

Awake and Aware

 

imageAwake and Aware
“we all get rocks along the journey, they’re all gems in their own right”

Dylan, my 13 year old son and I started an Instagram page a month or so ago, sharing his ‘treatment’ journey, to help create awareness of childhood cancer. This journey is pretty hectic and I have found that sharing short and fast is easier rather than a longer piece written on a blog, so haven’t written much here. But Instagram is our shared page for sharing and my blog is my space for sharing. I still honor and respect that this is Dylan’s journey and so I get his ‘approval’ before I share anything publicly, but I suppose I can share differently in my blog.
It’s been 6 months that we’ve been on this crazy ride and I recently shared a collection of ‘the face of childhood cancer’ of Dylan, and realized that we are still not really sharing all of it, I’m not sure the whole picture can ever be shared, but in our quest to raise awareness I write this short blog and share it with you all.

 

I can’t share photos of Dylan in pain, crying, frustrated, sick, confused and afraid because at those moments I was holding him, comforting him, drying his tears, wiping his head, holding the vomit bag, having him squeeze my hand … There are accidental shots, very far and few between that capture the rest of the reality behind the smile. Maybe this is why we have half a picture of what childhood cancer really is.
Childhood cancer doesn’t end after the last radiation or the final chemo drug is injected. Children’s bodies and minds are not fully grown, so the treatments they receive have very far reaching consequences on their lives, forever. When Dylan has his final dose of chemo, his journey changes,


it doesn’t end. I share this not for pity or sympathy, but for awareness, I share this for the others who will encounter this path in life, for the ones who won’t, because I never knew this world existed until now, perhaps sharing this will bring that one day closer, the day where treatments are only helpful and not harmful.

 

Our only intention is to create awareness. Help us make a difference to the future of Children who will travel this path, share the awareness, be the change.

 

image‘This kid is definitely walking this path in presence and peace with courage and acceptance.’